Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Anger management

I tripped across a blog today and for the first time ever wanted to send a nasty reply to a post. I did not, but only by an act of extreme self control.

She was criticizing other bloggers - specifically "mommy bloggers" - for posting about the minutiae of their lives, when there are so many more "big issues" people should be blogging about. She upbraided the masses for being so afraid of "being alone." Of failing to delve into grief.

The kicker, of course, is that the title of her blog (which I hesitate to name) is basically "celebrating the minutiae of life." Ha. This is irony, crashing down with a big-ass stick.

Apparently, at least a dozen readers found wisdom and encouragement in her words. I'm guessing that I'm the only one out there who thought she came off as a pretentious, self-righteous brat.

What I don't understand is why posts about joy and happiness and the little good things that happen in the day of a mother should bother her so much. True, everything said about happiness has been said before. Children, like puppies, are cute and snuggly. (Except when they are oozing snot and puking in pastel colors, or coloring on the freshly painted walls of the master bedroom, or playing in dog poop. But nevermind.) Motherhood fills us all with warm fuzzies. (Even when there is more laundry, pound for pound, than people in your house and the washing machine just broke, the baby has been screaming for six hours and your husband comes home complaining that he is just "so tired" so he can't help.)

But everything about despair and grief has been said before too. Many, many authors have made their life work out of writing about these "real" issues. Want despair? Try reading Koskinski's The Painted Bird. There's a portrayal of grief and abuse that will knock you off your chair.

I know, we're supposed to be talking about the blogosphere, not good, old-fashioned books. But there's the problem - we're not talking about literature. We're talking about people's personal, daily journals. Some mommy bloggers are looking for a spot to stretch their literary wings. And brava to those ladies.

But many more of us are just hoping for a little corner of cyber-space to use as a mirror of sorts. A place to hold up a few moments in our daily lives and say "would you look at that!" or "does yours do this?" We are seeking out a place where we can say "This is where I am right now. Anybody with me?"

5 Comments:

Melodee said...

Everyone has a story . . . so why not tell it?

Anonymous said...

I wish I was a mommy blogger. I am, after all, one bad mother.

Jessica Spotswood said...

Hey, I for one am fascinated by your posts about being a mommy, even though I'm not one yet. I think those tiny moments that comprise day to day living are frequently more interesting to read about than pretentious Big Philosophical Topics.

Anonymous said...

I think there's room for all sorts of blogs. I like reading about craft projects, recipes, what kiddos are up to...and I like reading about the valleys and trials and introspective side of life. Not that I like other's pain (God, no) but it helps me understand better and know I am not so alone with some of my issues. My blogroll is a definate reflection of that.

Anonymous said...

I think it's important to remember why people blog. Everyone's reasons are different. Why should their blogs all be the same.

If I find a blog I have no appreciation for, I simply move on. Why denigrate it?